Monday, June 20, 2016

So why chemo?

I have gotten a couple of comments about treating my MS with chemo. Am I scared? Isn't it risky? I'm not scared. It has been a little nerve wracking because there have been a lot of unknowns in this process and much of it has been hurry up and wait but to be honest the thing I have been most nervous about was how my hair would turn out.

Gotta have blue hair
💇đŸģ 💇 đŸģI wanted to cut it short so it wasn't as big of a shock when I lose my hair. And I dyed it blue because I wanted something funky and wanted to feel like a badass chick going into chemo. Unfortunately there were some problems at the salon, like all the color washing out the first time and it didn't really end up the color I wanted. I didn't really think it looked that good but I keep getting these random comments on the street which helps the self esteem.

Greek Runes: Strength overcoming challenge
I'm not nervous about this treatment because it has been proven to work. Dr Burt has successfully treated hundreds of MS patients. The treatment has fewer longer term side effects and more promising results than the other drugs. I know that the chemo will be a challenge but I can deal with short term suck for hopefully longer lasting good. I'd rather face a week of chemo than deal with the daily side effects that I was getting from some of the previous medications I was on.

I know it sounds odd but I'm excited to get chemo. I know it is my best shot at real recovery, at getting my life back to normal, because to tell the truth MS has been kicking my ass. I know that it is hard to see how the MS effects me sometimes and that a lot of times I appear relatively unencumbered but when the disease acts up it hits me hard. Like two months ago when I lost control of my hand due to a flare up. It took almost two weeks before I was able to use utensils again. Now things are pretty well back to "normal" but it took a much of steroids, time, and therapy to get there. Each time I have a flare up we never know what the symptoms will be or how long it will take to recover or to what extent I will recover. I'm ready for that not to be the reality I face every few months.

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